Coming About

By Susan Tyler Hitchcock

Excerpted from Sailing, November 2002:

“They could be any cruising family: the sun-browned mom and dad and two towheaded children smiling from the cover of the book Coming About. But when the Hitchcocks set sail they do so on a different trajectory, almost from page one.

“Torn between the office and parenting, author Susan Hitchcock was exhausted. Her husband, David, worked long and late keeping a business afloat. Their marriage sputtered. At this point, some couples would have chosen to go numb, do battle or fly apart. Instead, the Hitchcocks went sailing, leaving their land lives in the Virginia mountains on a nine-month cruise. ‘I did not want a simpler marriage. I wanted to strengthen the one I had,’ Hitchcock writes of her family's decision to follow the path less traveled.

“As they worked their 34-foot sloop HEI TIKI down the Bahamian archipelagos and through the Caribbean, David, his daughter Alison and son John entrusted their most private selves to the writer in their midst — a writer who was also mother and wife. The result is an emotional log seldom encountered in cruising literature.

“Narrated in witty, intelligent prose by Susan, for whom this was the first book, Coming About lays bare the anatomy of marriage and children, and the healing power of life at sea. In the world of a small boat where every tension is magnified, the Hitchcocks were lucky. They succeeded. The novice mate became a capable partner. Her silent captain learned to speak. They rekindled their sex life. Their children became confident and aware.

“The author pulls no punches, sharing crisis and triumphs alike as she retells the story of her family's adventures afloat. From sharing watches to home-schooling, this is the book to read if you want to know what it's really like to voyage with significant others.

“The Hitchcocks are blesed with intelligence and a desire to solve problems instead of running away. But there is something even more unusual about their story: Susan Hitchcock, the writer, and her struggle to actuate her destiny. ‘The pattern of our lives is essentially circular,’ she writes, quoting from Anne Morrow Lindbergh's Gift from the Sea. ‘We must be open to all points of the compass; husband, children, friends, home… How desirable and how distant is the ideal of the contemplative, artist, or saint – the inner inviolable core, the single eye.’

“Somewhere between Virginia and the Caribbean, the Hitchcocks learned to accommodate this difficult calling, and there's no doubt the author can tell a story and turn a phrase. She writes of intense emotions with great control, so that we are not made uncomfortable, only entertained.”

Sailing & Yachting (SA), November 2002:

“In 12 years of marriage, the author and her husband produced two children, and acquired all the trappings of suburbia – house, garden, and the long hours of work necessary to keep it all together. With that came fatigue, often frustration, and other problems, and they began to drift apart to the point where their partnership remained intact by only the most slender of threads.

“They needed a life-saver, a spark that would perhaps rekindle their relationship.

“In the hope of salvation, they turned to sailing. Thus the author and her children, novices all, and husband David, a proficient sailor, sail a 34-ft sloop for nine months and 3,500 miles around the Caribbean. They discover many wonderful places, meet many fascinating people; and it is as much a travel tale as a warts and all story about coping with willful kids, about coming to terms with one another, and about rebuilding the marriage physically and spiritually.